I don't know why I am thinking about this so much lately or where this is even coming from, maybe it is because Jackson and Garrett are both at a fun age....but lately I just stop and think how thankful I am that I get to be home with them. Yes, there are times when money is tight with only one income. Yes, there are times when both boys (and Aaron...and Rigley) are driving me nuts. Yes, it can be challenging and at times overwhelming having two kids so close in age. Yes, I know that sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder and I should probably do more things for myself....but I am truly loving every single moment. I love watching them play together. I love watching each of them discover new things. I love how Garrett stares at Jackson without Jackson knowing and I love how Jackson stares at Garrett without Garrett knowing. They love watching each other and figuring out what the other one is doing. I love that Aaron or I are the first person they see when they wake up each morning. People will sometimes ask me if I miss teaching. At times I do. I loved the classroom, but I remember the feeling I felt driving to work every morning after having Jackson. I was going to work to teach 22 other children, when really I would rather be at home teaching my own child. Jackson was always in good hands, but I still missed so much. I know what it feels like to miss things, so I know what I have to be thankful for. I also know what it feels like to know there is a small chance you will ever be able to have a child of your own, so I know what I have to be thankful for.
I know there are people who read this blog that would rather be at home with their little one than at work or school on certain days. I know there are good people who read this blog that want and deserve to have a baby so badly, but can't at this moment. It's not fair. Even though I now have children of my own, I remember the heartache and fear of that day never coming. Having been in your shoes before, I think that made me a better mom today. I know I have a great husband who has to work his butt off because he understands the importance of me being home with the boys, two healthy children, and a roof over our heads....I don't take it for granted because I know it doesn't have to be this way and it may not be this way one day. But at this moment, I am very thankful!
The Polar Express
6 years ago
1 comments:
Cherish these years because in years to come, there will be "special" times that you will remember and laugh about. Children grow so fast that sometimes we wonder where the years went. I love that we are such a close knit family and can share these precious moments. I love you all and I am so very proud of each and every one of you. You guys have made my life so happy. And I too, am thankful and blessed with the life that has been given me.
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